Don’t worry, we haven’t taken up TV dinners — Alex and I have been out of town this week, and we will be gone next week as well. Keep checking back though, as we will post sporadically, and gear up for an intense cooking season this fall semester. Woot!

This recipe is a culinary magic trick. The finished product appears to be extremely impressive, but the process is simple beyond belief. If we were real magicians, we wouldn’t reveal our secrets, but I only know one card trick and the only magic Alex knows is from playing Magic the Gathering, so I think we are not so bound by rules of the trade. Anyway, if we can do this, you can do it.

Ingredients:
12 egg yolks
1 can sweetened condensed milk
2 cans evaporated milk
1 tsp vanilla
1/2 cup sugar

Instructions:
Preheat oven to 375. Wisk eggs together with milks and vanilla. In a saucepan, heat the sugar until it melts into a liquid. Divide the liquid evenly between two rectangular loaf pans (3 in. x 9 in., or something in that vicinity). Pour mixture evenly over the sugar in the two pans. Cover pans with in foil, and place them in a larger baking plan or pyrex, and add about a 1/2 inch of water to the bottom of the dish. Bake for 1 hour.

First guest blogger! Whooo!

Sorry, had to be done. This is Danny, the Als’ roommate for the summer, and I’ve been granted a rare opportunity to appear on Two Fat Als due to my position as our de facto bartender. In what may or may not become a regular feature, we decided Wednesday should be celebrated with an appropriately named Drink of the Wednesday. When I say we, I really mean Alanna, but whatever: tonight’s drink, courtesy of my being part Brazilian, is a caipirinha. It’s a drink that’s become fairly popular in the U.S., but once you see how easy it is to make, you may never pay eight bucks for one in a bar again. And remember: if you’re under 21, you didn’t learn this here.

Caipirinha
1 lime (or 2 key limes)
2 tbsp sugar
Crushed ice
2 shots cachaça

Cachaça is an un-aged Brazilian sugar cane liquor that’s pretty similar to rum, and is fairly easy to find in most liquor stores. If you can’t get your hands on it, or you’re feeling lazy, you can use rum or vodka. Just know that you won’t be making a caipirinha–rum makes it a caipirão, and using vodka turns it into a caipiroska. Go figure.

Whatever liquor you’re using, the instructions are the same. Start by cutting off the ends of the lime; because the peel contains the bitter lime oil that, although it gives the drink its punch, can be overpowering if you include all of the peel. Then, quarter the lime and put the pieces into an old-fashioned glass (one of those short cocktail glasses, like you’d get a whiskey sour in). Add the sugar, and muddle it into the limes (muddling is a fancy word for mushing, ideally done with a pestle though I’ve used the handle of a ladle in a pinch). Then just add ice to about half an inch below the glass’s rim, pour in the cachaça, stir, and enjoy. A word to the wise, though: remember that, although you may not taste it, you just tossed in two shots of 80-proof liquor. Caipirinhas are one of the most refreshing drinks I know, but they pack quite a punch, and you may want to keep that in mind.

Dear Two Fat Als:

We’re planning to have dinner this friday with friends who are currently vacationing in Maine. The good news is that they are bringing live lobsters for dinner which we are planning to grill. The bad news is that one of their daughters is a vegetarian, and won’t eat lobster. Here’s the question: what preferably grillable vegetarian entree goes well with lobster (besides,of course, cole slaw and corn on the cob)? We look forward to your prompt reply, as we only have 2 days to plan. Thanks, and by the way, I love your blog.

Stumped in CT

Dear Stumped,

Vegetarian grill options can be difficult to come up with, as most grilled vegetable make better side dishes than main plates. Yet we think we have the perfect recipe for you! Cooks Illustrated has a truly UNBELIEVABLE recipe for homemade veggie burgers. It takes a bit of time, but they turn out smoky and light and delicious. Additionally, we believe that veggie burgers will accompany any other side dishes that you decide to conjure, and the fact that you made them from scratch will compensate for the fact that veggie burgers may not stereotypically be as classy as lobster. Don’t be scared, this recipe is beyond good. Click here to view it!

Two Fat Als

This afternoon we endured 100 degree heat to visit the Oakmont Farmer’s Market in Haverford, which is run by one of Alex’s professors. Thanks, Janet, for your warm welcome and amazing produce! Not only did we score free samples of Great Harvest S’mores bread, but we found some beautiful tomatoes and a cucumber for the Gazpacho soup we’ve been intending to make all summer.

We looked up a recipe on Cooks Illustrated, but added a few extra ingredients recommended by the various Gazpacho experts in our lives. No actual cooking required, and the speed of the recipe depends on the preciseness with which you care to chop. I am obsessive, it took about 30 minutes. We also made delicious garlic croûtons with our leftover Bittman bread by simply brushing them with olive oil and garlic, and toasting them in the oven. This soup was so easy to make, and made for a great, cool meal on an unbearably hot evening.

Ingredients:
3 large tomatoes
1 large bell pepper
1 cucumber
1/2 red onion
1 garlic clove, minced
1/3 cup red wine vinegar
4-5 cups V8 juice
2 cups cilantro
salt
pepper

Instructions:
Chop the tomato, pepper, cucumber, chopped cilantro and onion into very small pieces, and combine in a bowl. Let sit for about 5 minutes. Add the vinegar and garlic, and salt and pepper to taste. Add V8 juice and stir. Add a few ice cubes and refrigerate until cool.

Oh my god! We made a video!